Why Shaming Demi Lovato for Her Sexuality is Wrong

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To answer this blog post's question, just reread the second and last three words of blog post's title.

I realize that today is still a very much tense social and political climate concerning various issues, including LGBTQ+ rights, but shaming a celebrity for not being open about her sexuality is just as wrong as shaming those that are open.

Now what am I talking about? Queen Demi Lovato, of course.

On September 20, Demi took to Twitter to voice her frustration concerning criticism toward her for not being open about what exactly her sexuality is, saying:

Twitter

And to which I agree with Demi.

Yes, Demi has been an open LGBTQ+ ally and activist.
Yes, Demi has urged her fans to be true to themselves and be confident in who they are.
Yes, Demi has been open about many issues in her life, including her mental health issues, relationships, and political stances.

But Demi Lovato's openness and encouraging others to be open doesn't mean that she has to be open about EVERY aspect of her life, in this case particularly her sexuality which is in question.

While the pop singer has teased people with songs such as "Cool For The Summer," in which she sang about possible female-on-female experimentation and has said that her songs are "based off of personal experiences," Lovato is in no way forced to tell all the world publicly her sexual orientation, which is a private matter.

Although I'm all about celebrities being outspoken about their sexuality and other important aspects of their life, and celebrities being outspoken about these things generally has been helpful and motivating to fans who have struggled and dealt with the same issues as them, one's sexual orientation is a delicate thing.

As I've emphasized many times and should be clear, no one - celebrity or non-celebrity - should be forced to discuss this private matter. While being vocal about your sexual orientation if you're from the LGBTQ+ community can be important, it's also important to consider why someone might not be open about their orientation. Although some possibilities for not coming out about a hidden orientation might be due to shame or fear of the reactions the person might get, every story is different and have different factors, which are important to consider.

Some people might not be so vocal about their orientation because they still don't understand what exactly their orientation is. Before coming to terms with your orientation you first have to understand what exactly your orientation is, which isn't something that happens for everyone right away. Thus, in turn, if you don't know exactly what your orientation is and you're still trying to figure yourself out as a human and your sexuality, why come out for something...you don't know? Coming out can be a scary experience for anyone, but even more so if you still aren't sure, yet you decide to come out, and later discover that what you proclaimed to be...well, you aren't? It's important that people come out when they are READY to, not when they feel pressured to.

So for this, I clap for Demi Lovato for taking control of her sexuality, when and if she chooses to discuss it. It's important that she talks about it when she feels she is prepared for it, and by the words of her latest tweet, "If you're that curious about my sexuality, watch my documentary," it's fair to guess that Lovato feels comfortable to talk and be open about her sexuality until her documentary airs. But even if she didn't discuss it, like Demi Lovato said herself: "I don't owe anybody anything."

Insert clapping emoji here.

Sincerely, Dora Goto